I hate kids

As part of my overall "I hate everyone"  mentality, I specifically hate kids.... so:

My list of reasons not to have kids
(Note, this list has contributions from women too, marked where appropriate.)


1. Loud
2. Smelly
3. Expensive
4. weight gain (women)
5. moodiness (women)
6. diapers
7. constant interruption
8. lack of sleep
9. no life of your own
10. stretch marks (women)
11. day care
12. kid's friends
13. being a chauffeur
14. paying for college
15. brats/obnoxious
16. teen years
17. perceived loss of IQ of parents ("oh look at the cute baby, cootchie cootchie coo!"/other baby talk... yeah, you sound like an idiot)
18. constant worrying
19. Elmo
20. children's music
21. children's tv shows
22. Teletubbies (needed a seperate number for this one)
23. they don't listen
24. they get in the way
25. people get annoyed at you for constantly talking (bragging) about them
26. baby bodily fluids
27. ungrateful
28. can't drink for 9 months (women)
29. baby poop
30. breast feeding (women)
31. parents need to be mature (no fart jokes!)
32. prenatal vitamins suck (women)

If you have any other reasons not listed here, let me know!